


everybody gets high

by CarnivalVaccine (euphoricdecay)



Series: the song saga [song fics] [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Lowercase, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-05
Updated: 2018-10-05
Packaged: 2019-07-25 12:58:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16198013
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/euphoricdecay/pseuds/CarnivalVaccine
Summary: why the hell can't i?





	everybody gets high

**Author's Note:**

> warning :  
> This fic is based off of MISSIOS song 'Everybody Gets High', and there is lots of crazy shit beyond this work of fiction. Please read with caution and take nothing in here seriously. The drama starts right at the beginning of this fic so...get ready.  
> This is short because the idea came to me at 4 am...I just HAD to write it. I have no energy and no regrets. \\(○□~)/

> **_once upon a time in a land far away, there lived a little boy and he drank all day_ **
> 
>  

the day you found your boyfriend of 2 years swapping saliva with your lifelong enemy was the day you felt yourself become numb.

you felt shock. betrayal. but not sadness. nor the anger you would normally be filled with. you didn't say a word. you were completely mute.

the ravenette didn't even try to object your non-existent claims. he sat, silent, as the ginger on top of him smirked and taunted you.

**_"are you sad? now that your lover has made contact with a better person? we both knew this was going to happen, [name]."_ **

his annoying accent didn't deter you in the slightest from glaring at him. what actually instilled hurt into your mind was the fact that your now ex didn't even bother to speak.

he just sat there. his earth toned eyes were calm. held nothing. so you left. quietly shut the door and walked off, hux's cackles of success muffled. you went home to your apartment. the walk was long.

that night, you relasped.

> **_friends called him stupid and his brothers called him gay_ **
> 
> **_emptied all the bottles till the pain went away_ **

shot after shot. the numbness you previously felt only increased. your eyes flooded with tears as you knocked back another burning mouthfull of the devils water.

you had loved him. but your heart is now shrivelled. black. lacks what most desire in this world.

you found it ironic, to be honest. if you had described how you felt, he'd turn your words into poetry. you always loved his dark works.

but now they're painful reminders of the man you once adored with your being.

your phone had exploded with messages after you told your friends in a group chat what had occurred earlier in  the day.

**_"what?? no way." "tbh we saw it coming...the dude was rlly sus" "you're a f_cking moron for not seeing this."_ **

you didn't blame them for throwing hurtful words at you. but what hurt the most, was the

_**"we told you so."** _

> _**whiskey was his friend, he didn't have another / v** _ _**icodin his vice, his real only lover / smoked a pack or two, it never was a problem / popped a pill or two, really made him blossom** _
> 
> _**yup** _

the bottles littering your floor was the first thing you see once your hungover mind wakes up. your head pounded. it screamed at you, angry at the mess you had to clean.

you weren't numb enough.

hux sitting on kylos lap kept swarming your mind. a repetitive nightmare that set up camp in your mind, as well as your subconcious. 

you didn't think this would ever happen. but fate just knocked on your door and slammed the experience right into your face.

you get up off of your couch with a groan and shuffle towards your bathroom, kicking away stray bottles. your mirror needed to have a beautify button because you looked like shit.

your eyeliner was smeared, your eyes still a little puffy from your pity party. your hair an absolute mess.

luckily, your mirror was also a cabinet. you can hide from the unknown person in your reflection for now.

you click it open, to see a variety of medications and beauty products.

there it was. the godly bottle of misery killers.

'vicodin', the bottle read. you had gotten the bottle when you broke your arm a couple months ago. kylo had been so helpful...

shaking the memories away, you take the bottle and pop off the lid.

your phone buzzed.

after pouring a couple small tablets into your hand, you put the bottle down and pick up your phone.

_**"2 message(s) recieved** _

_**1.** _

_**From goth kid ♡** _

_**i'm sorry.** _

_**2.** _

_**From Unknown Number** _

_**Are you happy now? :)"** _

you snort, knowing who sent the last text and throw the tablets back into your throat.

bottoms up.

> _**take a sip take a sip take a sip** _
> 
> _**and i trip and i trip and i trip** _
> 
> _**take a sip take a sip take a sip** _
> 
> _**and i trip and i trip and i trip** _

the pills have kicked in and you have no fucking idea where you are right now.

absolute euphoria.

you also have no idea how you're feeling.

hungry? leftover pizza and some cheese sticks in the fridge. in the mood for video games? hook up your playstation and play outlast 2. maybe some farcry 4 or the evil within.

you don't care. you just don't want to be reminded of your slowly dissipating high.

> **_take a sip take a sip take a sip_ **
> 
> **_and i trip and i trip and i trip_ **
> 
> **_hah_ **
> 
> **_everybody gets high_ **
> 
> **_why the hell can't i_ **
> 
> ****

the bottle is next to empty and your vision is so blurry you can't even see the message you're currently typing to your ex.

**_"To: ex emo kid from mcr :/_ **

**_it's fine. as long as you're happy. goodbye."_ **

you huff and hit send. you can't feel your fingers now. your mind is quiet. but sometimes, quiet is violent.

is this the sweet, cold kiss of death? you feel like you need a jacket. but it's so calm. so quiet. so euphoric and you don't want this to end and why did he have to cheat on you with him and 

**_bzzzz_ **

your phone ruins the comfortable silence. but you don't move. your eyes close and your body relaxes.

**_"One new message(s)_ **

**_From: ex emo kid from mcr :/_ **

**_i told him to leave. i made a huge mistake and i regret it. i tore all my paintings apart...please come back."_ **

but you can't text back.

he's crazy, for thinking the dead can talk things out.

> _**everybody gets high** _
> 
> _**why the hell can't i** _

 

 


End file.
